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I will take my faith to Dublin – where my ghost is whispering I will find the next part of my story.


“They say mother earth is breathing
With each wave that finds the shore
Her soul rises in the evening
For to open twilight’s door
Her eyes are the stars in heaven
Watching o’er us all the while
And her heart it is in Ireland
Deep within the Emerald Isle”


–Ireland, by Garth Brooks

I stood on the Atlantic’s edge and watched the ocean’s foam stretch to touch me
It was seductive
My feet sank deep into the black lava sand
But then disappeared under the pounding waves, reminding me I am… erasable

A natural arch defined the vista to my left in the distance
The worlds newest islands were visible to my far right
Amazing topography forced a lungful of air at every turn
I felt bitter pleasure to absorb the beauty of this island alone

A seal danced for my enjoyment in the peaks of the ocean, amusing me 
She popped up and stared at me as I sipped champagne from the bottle
I toasted the beauty I witnessed in this land
I felt exhilaration as the cold water misted my hair, my skin
Baptizing me as if mother earth was reminding me that this is just the beginning

I stared out into the water that reaches uninterrupted to Antarctica, the other end of the world
I let out a yell that was smothered by the sound of the waves
My body felt tingles with the release
I felt the distinct richness of simplicity in this place
And I reveled in it

I thanked my higher power for the moment, the experience
I will return to this place, and I will share it

Music filled my ears, and I sang old songs I never heard before
Smiles appeared on my face that shortly before had displayed the deep sadness I can’t shake
Amazing how the transformation takes place so quickly
All it takes is believing that the ghost that stands behind me cares

Will the emerald shores be the place I feel home?
Will a walk in the cold Dublin rain wash me of my sins?
Or will a sit by the fireside melt away this cold I feel?
I will trust the ghost that wants to hold my hand as I witness the story of me

I will go, though I am scared
But I may also find what is missing
Something that may fill my gaps
Maybe my ghost will lead me to someplace new, someplace my spirit will find peace

Funny, Goofball, Sorry, Interested
“Ceiling Fan,” Sheer, Greedy, Bossy
Uniform, Red, Dishonesty, Used, Flash
Always, Tease, Goodbye
Hurt… really, really hurt

Uncomfortable, Smile, Bella, Wow, Ciao

Young, Kind, Handsome
Confused, Pissed, Add, Delete
Motorcycle, Humanities, Spirited
Baci, Washing Machine, In Sogno

Humble, Honest, Conversation, Company, Tea
Relaxing, Scared, Window, Kind
Smiles, Smiles, Smiles, Uncontrollable Smiles
Airport, Stew, Jersey, Saints, Angel
Friend, Confidant… Grateful, Thankful
“God loves a try’er” 🙂 …..   (I freaking love that saying)

Dreamt of Dublin last night. Though I have never been, I pictured myself in a pub, sitting at the corner of a bar, watching the people come in and out. Listening to laughter, and realizing I too was smiling.

I believe Ireland is calling me, and I can’t wait to find out what’s waiting for me there.

Over the last couple of days I experienced what Ansel Adams tried to make us understand through his lens. There are no words to describe the beauty of the grandest temple of nature known to us as Yosemite. It was an absorption of energy, leaving me with no room whatsoever for doubt that there is a higher power we should all fall to our knees for. I walked the paths beneath the stars, breathed air so clean and crisp my lungs felt the difference, and I dipped my feet in its cold raging rivers fed by bountiful waterfalls. The experience of sitting in its quiet completely shocked my spirit.

This place is my church. Here I will worship.

(written on July 5, 2011)

Heard this song on the radio again, and certain verses really are quite strong. The artists are called “One Republic” and the song is called “SECRETS”

“I need another story
Something to get off my chest
My life gets kinda boring
Need something that I can confess

‘Til all my sleeves are stained red
From all the truth that I’ve said
Come by it honestly I swear
Thought you saw me wink, no
I’ve been on the brink, so

Tell me what you want to hear
Something that will light those years
Sick of all the insincere
I’m gonna give all my secrets away”

The song goes on, but those particular lyrics are just right. After holding so much in for so long, I just want to bleed my honesty. I need to indulge as I look for calm. Ever need someone or something to light your years? Right now, I do. I’m sick of all the insincere. I’m burned from lies and uncalled for half truths. As a result, I have never craved honesty as much as I do at this point in my life. But, as I look around — all over the world — I find there is a culture of lies abounding, and most people drown themselves in it.