Ode to My Ghost

I didn’t anticipate the nervousness
Anxiety coarsed through my veins
The heat of my blood as he wrapped me in the warmth of his soul
I knew it was my ghost who was standing beside me… he kept true to his promise to find me

Paralyzed by fear and uncertainty
I was unsteady, unsure of how to be strong
But, my ghost stood there
He waited for me to acknowledge him

I instantly knew
He appeared in my window because he needed me too
He was as lost as I was
He anchored to me, as much as I did to him

Two drifting souls
Unrecognized by the world
Lonely souls
In search of someone who would take care

I lived for so long with a broken spirit
My ghost reminded me that there was a decent woman under the weight of my selfish shame
My ghost followed me room to room, street to street, city to city
Never leaving my side

I faced him
I faced the truth
I faced myself
All while he watched over me

His presence made me feel safe
And I sang
Under his watch I found tranquility
Able, I witnessed the beauty of new land

Night after night he embraced my soul with his perspective
Night after night his voice soothed my loneliness
Night after night he tended to my bruises and healed my scars
Night after night he came back… for me

My ghost stayed true to all the whispers he had filled my ears with for so long before.
Then as our time drew near, he leaned in and asked me to stay
With those words I closed my eyes and fell hard
At that moment, the window he stood in before crashed, and nothing came between us

He gave me a gift…
My angel made me believe that I mattered
I was ready to breath again
I felt my heart whole, not broken
I could give myself again
I felt ready

My ghost is a friend
I will be his
I will never leave him behind
Not for a single day in this life of mine

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